i was born a porn star she said
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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