how can u be prego again
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
