so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
He told me they were just razor bumps!
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Randomize
