Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
