Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Randomize
