He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
