dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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