If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Randomize
