he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Randomize