That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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