; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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