Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize