Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize