He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
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