so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize