party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Your shirt... Was in my pants
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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