My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
He felt like a one man threesome
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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