remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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