At least make sure they are 18
Why
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Randomize
