Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
