wat bout pragnant strippers??
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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