Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize