IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize