porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
Randomize
