Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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