that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
