I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
