I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
