Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
