i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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