oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
