I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize
