I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
