When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
Randomize
