turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
