You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
We're like a lot better than the average bears
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
lets start a swedish sibling band together
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
