If that was your dad, he is hot
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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