I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
