I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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