you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Randomize
