The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Randomize
