i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
