oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Randomize
