I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
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