So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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