what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
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