we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
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