I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
