so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
