Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
