Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
